Dating When You're a Single Parent

Dating and the Single Stay-at-home Parent

Do you wonder if it is okay to date if you are a single stay-at-home parent? Yes, it is, but you have to understand it is not the same as when you were single with no children.

For many people they have been out of the dating game for a while and the thought of dating again is uncomfortable, but the thought of having conversation and relaxing with another adult also makes it appealing.

The problem you will face first is that as a single stay-at-home parent you are not going to be able to turn your life into a social event. You have a family and whether you want to believe it or not, your social life won’t be every night. It takes a back seat to your children. However, with a little balance, you can have a social life also.

Your children might not understand why you want to go out without them. Your need for adult interaction is not something they will understand. Your first question is, do I keep my dating life separate from my life with my children? Not only will you be anxious, so will your children.

You will have a long list of questions you need to answer. Should I ask my date come to our home? Should I introduce my date to my children? The list can go on and on. For me the answer was no. I had to find out about the person before that person was allowed into my children life.

I discussed my dating with the children to let them know that they weren’t being abandoned. I let them know using something they could understand. I told them that it was like a play date only with adults. This is your decision, you don’t have to have your children’s approval, but including them is the smart thing to do.

Just because your children may be older doesn’t mean they are totally good with your dating. They may have fears that lead to anxiety. Since they have friends, relay to them that just like them, you need friends your own age. Let them know you are there for them and if you have a cell phone, let them call you if they must. Don’t encourage them checking up on you, but having the number often makes them more relaxed.
Dating is something you can do, but remember, protecting our children must remain your primary consideration. Like everything else, it is a balancing act.